I had to put up something to divert you all from that horrid picture of Bush down below (oh goddess, how I wish he was down below, and no, I don't mean below my desk right now, you pervs!). So, while traipsing through my files I've noticed a few of you have searched for my Dolly Parton cover of Stairway to Heaven (which I took down prematurely) and I just felt it needed re-airing. I'll add another track from that album so you know what Dolly should sound like too.

Plus I know how much Puppet Show loves it. :)

Stairway to Heaven mp3 Dolly Parton Halos and Horns

I'm gone mp3 Dolly Parton Halos and Horns

ok, the antidote is here:

August, 1993:

• For the first time, the public is allowed inside Buckingham Palace.
• Ong Teng Cheong becomes the first President of Singapore elected by the population.
• New York Yankees 4, Cleveland Indians 0, at Cleveland Stadium
• 6 months earlier the World Trade Center was bombed for the first time "when a car bomb was detonated below Tower One of the World Trade Center in New York City"
• Ace of Base was gearing up for their debut The Sign
• I Can't Help Falling In Love - UB40 - was the #1 song on Billboard's top 100
• Bjork's Debut er, debuts...still one of my favorite albums and I bought it when it first hit the shelves of my local record shop
• ditto with Violent Femmes, Add It Up (1981-1993)
  
• ditto with Queen Latifa, Black Reign, ( I didn't buy this one, but Meatpocket had this one in her arsenal, at the time I felt she was trying too hard, lol)
  
• a Tart and Meatpocket spend 4 hours in a bookstore discussing whether or not we should spend our futures together, at which point the shopclerk poked his head in and said, "oh just kiss her already and get it over with!"
  

So yeah, that's the origins of a 15-year-and-counting collaboration, folks. To say I wooed her with music is an understatement. I downright tested her with tunes, like in that scene in Diner where Levinson has his character Steve subject Elise, his fiance, to a football quiz before the marriage. I trained my little Meatpocket to recognize my music, to trace the transition from punk to post-punk to grunge. I quizzed her on the difference between The Violent Femmes, The Ramones, and The Smiths. The poor little Madonna fan didn't have a chance, really.

But I had to know if she could tolerate and come to love it/me, ya see. Would she be welcome in my world? I'm not ashamed to name my insecurities, I worried about it! There were real barriers between us, like the barriers between men and women in Levinson's Diner.

And well, music was my litmus test. She came from a world where life looked pretty easy: a happy family, loads of opportunities, well-traveled, well-educated, well-bred. In a word, she has very upper-class tastes and she came by them honestly. Luckily my sweetie had a bit of a working-class fetish.

We drove for hours in the countryside at night, just listening to music -- my music. Cassette after cassette was popped into the car player. I threw all the raw, basic, hard-edged and meaningful stuff I had at the time, asking with false bravado if she was sure she didn't mind the volume being up so high. Within a few days a mixtape appeared on my doorstep, love songs: Bonnie Raitt, Sweet Honey In The Rock, Aretha Franklin, Queen Latifa, Billy Holiday, Simon and Garfunkle, etc. Over the years, I learned to soften the edges on my soul with her love and her music, to let people in quicker, and deeper. She learned to not try so hard with mine, and just shake her booty to whatever beat she liked, deep down. Over the years we've learned to merge. We're still learning, it's a process.

If you want advice on how to make it to 15 years and keep going strong, how to be even better than when you first met, do two things:

1. Don't insist on being alike or having something in common, that's just bullshit.
2. Marry a woman who wants to be called Meatpocket and has the sex drive of a "working girl" with the breeding of a princess ;)

photo credit: jan_et_


Here's basically what I wooed my girl with back in '93, forgive me for the Mellencamp, it was 15 years ago, ok!? But they're all exactly not the kind of music a girl like Meatpocket was listening to at the time, I assure you.

So, welcome to the first ever Tart mixtape :) I'll give em to ya one by one and then zipped just in case you would like a single download :).... and uh yeah, if you do wish to listen to the whole thing, the order matters.

Add It Up, Violent Femmes, Add It Up (1981-1993) buy it
Pink Houses, John Mellencamp, Uh Huh buy it
Lola, The Kinks, Lola versus Powerman and the Moneygoround, Part One buy it
Whole Lotta Love, Led Zeppelin, Led Zeppelin II buy it
Crazy On You, Heart, Dream Boat Annie buy it
Anarchy In The U.K, Sex Pistols, Never Mind The Bollocks Here's The Sex Pistols buy it
Wargasm, Bricks Are Heavy buy it
Sex Type Thing, Stone Temple Pilots, Core buy it
Bad Reputation, Joan Jett, Bad Reputation, buy it
It's Different For Girls, Joe Jackson, I'm The Man buy it
I Love You, Steve Miller Band, Anthology buy it
Blue Sky, Allman Brothers, Allman Brothers - A Decade of hits 1969-1979 buy it
There Is a Light That Never Goes Out, The Smiths, The Queen Is Dead, buy it
The Milkman of Human Kindness, Billy Bragg, Back To Basics, buy it
anniversary.zip

Over at Licorice Pizza I've been enjoying the "Ultimate Led Zeppelin Session Disks" which are a Zeppelin lover's delight. Some are just re-takes, some are session recordings, all are another glimpse into the genius of Robert Plant and Jimmy Page in their heyday. No one that knows me understands why I get glassy eyed listening to this stuff. It's nice to realize that all two or three readers here might appreciate it :)

And as I'm quite partial to crazy covers, I'll post my all-time favorite one for you. Now, I'm not into all covers. For me the perfect cover has to fulfill three goals

1. the original song as to have been a major hit and still be quite recognizable - no esoterica allowed
2. the cover artist has to be well known, you shouldn't have to look at the label to know who's covering what
3. it can't sound too much like the original, whoever is covering it should give the cover their own flavor, style or hue

This cover far exceeds my three goals, it is perfection! And it makes me giggle every single time I play it. I hope it does the same for you. Aikin, I really hope you've never heard this one before :)

Stairway to Heaven mp3 Dolly Parton Halos and Horns

buy it off of Dolly's website